


And From the Dark a Light Breaks the Silence

by robindrake93



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Alive Noah Czerny, Boys Kissing, Cheating, Cheating Ronan, College Student Adam Parrish, Denial of Feelings, Empath Noah Czerny, Eventual Happy Ending, Everyone Needs A Hug, Explicit Sexual Content, First Love, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Living Together, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Minor Adam Parrish/Declan Lynch, Minor Henry Cheng/Richard Gansey III/Blue Sargent, Monmouth Manufacturing, Noah Czerny Family, Noah Czerny is a Little Shit, POV Ronan Lynch, Past Joseph Kavinsky/Ronan Lynch, Ronan Lynch Has Feelings, Roommates, Skater Noah Czerny, Slow Burn, Soft Ronan Lynch, The Barns (Raven Cycle), Underage Drinking, courting gifts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-21
Updated: 2019-10-21
Packaged: 2020-12-27 07:41:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21115172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/robindrake93/pseuds/robindrake93
Summary: Ronan whispered, “Are you real?”Noah brought Ronan’s hand to his chest, pressed Ronan’s palm over his beating heart. “Real and alive.”“Alive,” Ronan repeated. The word brought exhilaration and apprehension in equal measure. Ronan thought this was what hope must feel like. It was the potential of possibility. Noah’s heart beat like a promise against his palm.---(The only reason that Ronan ended up with Adam was because Noah was already dead and Kavinsky died shortly after. Gansey seemed straight until his bisexual awakening with Henry. Go figure. But then Noah wasn’t dead and the sparks were flying between him and Ronan.)





	And From the Dark a Light Breaks the Silence

**Author's Note:**

> If you don't like the font color, click "Hide Creator's Style" at the top and it'll revert to black. Don't reupload/repost my fics.

  
Ronan was sure that he was seeing ghosts again. This in and of itself wasn’t unusual for him. One of his roommates turned out to be a ghost. But Ronan hadn’t seen this ghost in over a year, not since what happened on the ley line. They were all sure that Noah was gone for good. It was over a year that Ronan had woken to scratches on his skin. Noah died so that Gansey could live.

That was what happened. 

Ronan blamed it on the fact that Henrietta was a lot quieter now that everyone he loved was out of town. He missed the raven pack who had become his family. When it was just himself in the places they used to haunt together, Ronan could admit this to himself. If they were there, he may even admit it to them as well. Everyone that Ronan had ever loved was either out of town or dead. 

The boy was in the cereal aisle at the grocery store. His blond hair was styled in an undercut. He wore jeans and a highlighter-pink t-shirt that seemed to glow under the fluorescent lights. The boy’s eyes and face were hidden from view. He didn’t seem to notice that Ronan stood a few feet away, staring at him like a creep. 

Longing cut through Ronan so sharply that he looked down at his chest, half expecting to find it tore open. 

“Oh!” The boy’s voice drew Ronan’s attention back to him. He’d found the Lucky Charms and fumbled with the box before walking away from Ronan. Not once did Ronan get a good look at his face. The boy was not Noah. No way, no how. He was too real, too present to be Noah. He shined in a way that Noah never did when Ronan knew him. Noah had often been more a suggestion of a boy than a real flesh and blood creature. 

With the boy gone, Ronan immediately chastened himself. He was being such a creep. Who watched someone else buy their cereal? His inner voice sounded a lot like Gansey. Ronan turned in the opposite direction the boy had gone in because he couldn’t quite stand to think of more accidental stalking. He put the blond boy from his mind as he put instant coffee into his basket. There was a boy close to his heart already, even though Adam was far in body. Adam was the one that Ronan should be thinking about. 

Ronan finished his shopping - so much lonelier and less fun now that Gansey was gone - and by the time he got home, he’d forgotten the blond boy. 

\---

Ronan didn’t leave the Barns very often. Now that the Glendower search was over with and Gansey was out of town with Blue and Henry, Ronan didn’t explore the forest very often. Now that Adam was away at college and not at one of his million jobs, Ronan didn’t have to wander around town looking for him. Ronan didn’t race because that made him think of Kavinsky and he didn’t go to Monmouth Manufacturing because that made him think of Noah. 

Every Sunday, Ronan made a point of going to church with Matthew and Declan. With Matthew between them, Ronan and Declan were able to save their fighting for after church. Any attempts at going for brunch usually ended in a fight between Ronan and Declan. The two eldest Lynch brothers were fighting less these days, though. 

Declan was single - shocking - and Ronan had settled down with someone that both Gansey and Declan approved of - also shocking. School was a thing of the past for Ronan so Declan couldn’t get on him about failing or dropping out; thought he still grumbled about Ronan dropping out. Ronan wasn’t racing and he got drunk on his own property rather than in public places so Declan couldn’t say anything about that. 

They didn’t have much to fight about anymore but they also didn’t make an effort to spend time together unless explicitly requested by Matthew. 

Another big reason for Ronan not leaving the Barns was Opal. She liked to destroy the things that Ronan dreamed and she constantly tried to eat Chainsaw. Ronan couldn’t leave the two of them alone unless he wanted to come back to find a mess. 

So it was a week before Ronan made it back into town. Chainsaw perched on his shoulder and Opal was at home doing who knows what. The people of Henrietta were used to seeing Ronan with a raven on his shoulder and she was generally fairly well behaved all things considered so they never said anything. It probably helped that Ronan was rich enough to buy the entire town if he wanted to.

Ronan ducked into a coffee shop for a cup of coffee that he didn’t have to make himself. He wasn’t a morning person so it was well into the afternoon when he arrived and yet the shop was still busy. He looked at the menu and tried to decide what the hell he should order. There was a mint tea on the menu and the reminder of mint made him miss Gansey. It was stupid to let his emotions influence him like this. They were only going to be gone for another six months. Ronan didn’t even like tea. He dropped his eyes from the menu to the desert display. 

Instead of deserts, Ronan’s gaze fell on the back of someone’s head. The boy was nearly as tall as Ronan and he had blond hair styled in an undercut. He wore shorts, a tie-dye t-shirt and skater shoes. When it was his turn to order, the boy leaned across the counter and Ronan couldn’t hear his voice. But Ronan did hear him laugh. 

_Noah._

The boy turned around and nearly ran into Ronan. He smiled as he slipped away to go wait for his drink. There was no dark smudge on his cheek. It wasn’t Noah. It _couldn’t_ be Noah. Noah didn’t have an undercut, either. His hair was all the same length and he slicked it back.

By the time Ronan ordered the tea he didn’t want, the boy had gotten his drink and was gone. Ronan felt like his chest was crumbling. Why did he have to go and get his hopes up like that? He took a seat in the corner of the shop and drank his tea. The tea wasn’t bad but it only made him lonelier. 

\---

Ronan didn’t have to keep driving the BMW but he enjoyed it no matter what Blue said about it being bad for the environment. He leaned against the car’s side while he pumped gas and let his eyes wander. 

The boy was dressed like a highlighter again, though he wore a tank top instead of a t-shirt today. His tank top loudly declared BITCH in block letters across his chest. He had a soda and candy in one hand, a skateboard in the other. The boy dropped the skateboard and put his foot on it to stop it from rolling away. Then he looked up, caught Ronan staring at him. 

Ronan couldn’t tell what color his eyes were from this distance but he thought they were light. Noah’s eyes were light. But the cheek was wrong; there was no mark. Not Noah. 

The boy gave him a two fingered wave then skated off before Ronan could respond. 

The gas pump clicked, signaling that Ronan’s tank was full. When Ronan looked up again, there was no sign that the boy had ever been there. Now that was true Noah style. Ronan went into the gas station and bought some beer for later. He was still underage but the person behind the counter didn’t card him. 

Ronan sat in his car and tried to convince himself that Noah was still dead. He was just running into a boy who happened to look a lot like Noah. And who laughed like Noah. Ronan didn’t believe in coincidences. He pulled out his phone and dialed Gansey’s number. 

It took Gansey a long time to answer. “Ronan? Are you alright?” 

Now that Ronan heard Gansey’s voice, he wasn’t sure what to say. “You haven’t heard from Noah have you?” 

Gansey was quiet for a moment. “No, I haven’t heard from Noah.” His voice was laced with concern. “Have you heard from him?”

Ronan rested his head on the steering wheel. He was being stupid and now he’d dragged Gansey into that stupid. The boy just happened to look and sound like Noah. “No.” 

“Are you alright?” Gansey repeated. There was a murmur of conversation from the other end of the line. Right. Gansey was off living his life and Ronan was interrupting for nothing. 

“I’m fine.” Ronan rubbed his eyes. “I gotta go. Tell Sargent and Cheng hi for me. Make good choices. Have safe sex.” Ronan hung up before Gansey could come up with a response for that. He pulled out of the gas station parking lot and drove towards home. 

\---

Opal caught Ronan on the porch and pointed towards the woods. “There’s a thing out there.” 

Ronan raised an eyebrow. “There are a lot of things out there.” He stayed standing though, because he had the feeling that she wanted him to go look. Ronan took a sip of his beer.

Opal made a face up at Ronan that told him she wasn’t impressed. She pointed again to the woods. “It sounds like Adam!” 

That got Ronan’s attention because Adam was definitely _not_ anywhere near the Barns. He set his beer down and started walking in the direction Opal pointed. “Human?” 

Opal followed him and nodded. She led him to the spot she’d seen someone, which happened to be a lot farther from the house than Ronan thought. Opal didn’t seem to care that she was going beyond the boundaries of their territory. She led Ronan with a confidence that showed she’d been this way many times before. 

Ronan couldn’t decide if he was upset about this or not. He didn’t want to narrow her world too much and she was still in the forest. Maybe he would remind her that she was a secret. First he wanted to see what she’d found. Or _who_ she’d found. 

They kept walking and there was no sign of anyone. Finally Opal stopped and looked around. Her brow furrowed. “He was here.” 

“Who was here, Opal?” Ronan asked. They’d walked a long way and Ronan just wanted to go back home to his beer. 

Opal frowned up at Ronan. “The dead one.” 

\---

Ronan hadn’t been to Henrietta’s skatepark since he was ten. He knew that he wasn’t dressed for it and he didn’t even have a skateboard. Being here made him feel like a huge creep. A stalker, even. Ronan didn’t want to be weird. He wasn’t Noah. 

But Noah was why he was here. Or rather, the boy who _looked like Noah but definitely wasn’t him_ was why Ronan was there, hanging out on the edges of the concrete skatepark. 

It was easy to pick the boy out of the crowd because he was wearing an electric blue t-shirt today and the other kids were wearing dark colors. The boy’s jeans were rolled up to his knees and he’d acquired a thick leather bracelet that looked out of place on him. He was in constant motion, didn’t stop skating for a second. When the boy fell, he got right back up with a laugh His knees were a mess of red scrapes. He didn’t seem to notice. 

Ronan didn’t want to openly watch the boy but he felt like it was slightly less creepy than watching him from the corner of his eye. He sat down on a set of bleachers and tracked the boy’s movements with his eyes. 

The boy was pretty and most of that came from his appealing features but some of it came from his blatant love of life. He exuded life, howled his joy, was quick to laugh. The boy didn’t talk much to the other skaters but they clearly had no idea what to make of him. Maybe he was from out of town because he sure as hell would have caught Ronan’s attention before this. 

The longer that Ronan watched the boy skate, the more relaxed Ronan felt being there. His mind wandered into dangerous territory, forbidden territory. If Opal was still in his dreams, she would scold him. But Ronan had a type and he knew it. He liked boys who fell into the category of beautiful. He liked boys who were strong. 

Ronan liked the boy’s smile. He liked his teeth. He wondered what it would feel like to run his fingers through that silky blond hair. 

Another boy, an Aglionby one, had approached the boy. He moved like he was looking for a fight. His gestures were angry and he kept pointing to the skateboard. 

Ronan watched, tense, unsure if he should jump in or not. He didn’t like the Aglionby boy, simply because he was causing trouble. 

The boy said something, shook his head. Then he pointed directly to Ronan and the grin on his face was feral. 

Ronan felt his stomach swoop at the sight of that grin. It definitely didn’t belong on Noah’s face but it sure did things for Ronan. Ronan glared at them because he had a boyfriend, damn it. He shouldn’t be here, he shouldn’t be looking at another boy and wondering what his skin felt like. 

The Aglionby looked at Ronan and his face paled. He took a step backwards. Then he took off, unhappy but unwilling to start a fight. 

The blond’s smile turned from feral to sweet as sugar in a heartbeat. He winked at Ronan. Then he kept skating. 

Ronan waited ten minutes to make sure the Aglionby boy was gone, then he left too. He’d been caught watching and it made shame burn within him. It was rude to follow other people, even if it was only once. Anyway, Ronan was almost positive that it wasn’t Noah. Noah was dead. And Ronan didn’t need to distract himself with a boy that wasn’t Adam. 

\---

The next week found Ronan in town every single day. Ronan was becoming more and more convinced that he was seeing a ghost except that this time everyone else could see him too. It was like living in someone else’s dream.

Monday morning found Ronan in the coffee shop, pressed up against the boy’s back because it was a Monday morning and Ronan was an idiot for coming into the only coffee shop in town during rush hour. 

Tuesday afternoon, Ronan passed the makeup aisle at the grocery store and saw the boy picking out cosmetics. Ronan didn’t pause and the boy didn’t look up but he did smile when Ronan passed. 

Wednesday evening was finally cool enough that Ronan decided to brave the skate park again. The boy’s cheeks were highlighted with glitter when he skated past Ronan. He laughed as he passed Ronan and belted out the lyrics to an old Gwen Stefani song. Ronan stayed until dark. 

Thursday night, they literally ran into each other. Ronan was going in to the gas station for his beer and the boy was walking out with a box of donuts. The boy looked up at Ronan and for the first time, they were close enough that Ronan could see the color of his eyes. The pale blue of his irises was the same color as lightning. “S’cuse me,” the boy said and slipped past Ronan. 

On Friday around midnight, Ronan drove out to Monmouth Manufacturing. He hadn’t been to his temporary home since Gansey and co went on their trip around the world. There were lights on and a shadow moving. Ronan parked the BMW, left the keys in the ignition. He let himself into the downstairs and then quietly made his way up the metal stairs to the loft. The door was unlocked when he tried it. 

Ronan stood in the doorway and stared at the scene in front of him. 

The blond boy was there, because of course he was. Whenever Ronan left the Barns, he ran into the boy. The boy was shirtless, and his abs made Ronan’s mouth fill with water. He wore headphones - Ronan’s headphones - and danced around the model of Henrietta that Gansey had left in the middle of the floor. His hips swayed hypnotically. The jeans he wore rode low on his hips. He was barefoot. The boy sang Blink-182 in that top-of-the-lungs way that people who didn’t know they were being watched sang. 

The boy jerked to a sudden stop when he saw Ronan. Monmouth was much less lively without his voice filling the empty space. His pupils were small from fright but within moments they’d expanded. 

Ronan very much wanted the boy to be Noah but even if this boy wasn’t Noah, Ronan wanted to know him. It was dangerous territory to tread. “You’re breaking and entering,” Ronan said. He crossed his arms and leaned against the doorway. It was the only exit aside from the windows but the drop would break the bones of anyone who tried it.

The boy offered a dazzling smile. His teeth were perfect and straight. He grinned like a skull. “What are you gonna do about it?” 

The air between them was high pressure, electric. Ronan wasn’t sure what was happening but even though he was the one blocking the exit, he felt like he was trapped. “Take you into custody.” Was he flirting with or threatening the boy? 

The boy held out his wrists in invitation. Neither of them approached the other. The boy licked his lips, just a quick dart of his tongue. He gazed into Ronan’s eyes and seemed to be waiting. The look on the boy’s face said ‘_come on_’. 

Ronan waited a beat too long and the heat between them faded into disappointment. It was an awful thing; a thing that made Ronan feel like he was losing something, like more of him was crumbling away. He couldn’t bear it. Ronan approached, crossed the distance between them in three long strides. He clasped the boy’s wrists in both hands. Ronan had never believed in that electric touch bullshit but something passed between them and lit up Ronan’s nerves. 

The boy’s eyes slid closed at the touch. Goosebumps broke out on his arms. 

Ronan held both of his wrists. There was a pulse thumping steady against his fingertips. Noah didn’t have a pulse. Most of the time he didn’t even breathe. Ronan searched the boy’s face. It was so familiar to him, minus the dark smudge on his cheek. He knew this face. Ronan shifted the boy’s wrists to one hand and raised his other hand to touch the spot the smudge had been. “I don’t understand.”

The boy didn’t say anything for a long time. He was so still - aside from the steady beat of his heart - that Ronan feared he would vanish. “I was favored by the ley line.” That was Noah’s voice. Ronan wasn’t imagining it now that he heard an actual sentence.

“It’s been more than a year, Czerny.” Ronan was taking a risk. He still wasn’t sure if this was really Noah. His instincts said it was, though, and Ronan trusted his gut. 

“You used a lot of energy to bring Gansey back. The ley line needed to recharge.” It really was Noah. No one outside of their circle knew about what happened in the search for Glendower. Noah smiled again. “Hi, Ronan.”

Ronan‘s gaze flickered from Noah’s eyes to his lips and back again. He was suddenly very aware of how close they were. Ronan wanted to be closer. He wanted to prove to himself that Noah was alive. Ronan tamped down the urge. He was a taken man. “Hi, Noah.” 

Noah’s cheeks turned pink. His blush spread down to his bare chest. 

Ronan tracked it with his eyes and his eyes glazed over a little. Noah was fucking hot. Ronan always found him attractive, even when he was dead, but the Aglionby sweater didn’t do that six pack any favors. He released Noah’s wrists, took a step back. “Where the hell did you get a six pack?”

“Skateboarding.” Noah grinned. He was all smiles for Ronan. His hand ran down his abdomen absently. “And things. Do you like my hair?” 

Ronan followed the motion of Noah’s hand. He swallowed, averted his gaze. Noah's new haircut was attractive. Ronan told him so. 

Noah's smile was sweet as honey. "It's nice to be able to change things after eight years." 

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Ronan tempered the words by grazing his knuckles against Noah's arm. Yes, that was skin against his skin and it was warm to boot. 

Noah’s smile faltered a little. He looked around as though just now realizing where he was. He shrugged. “I didn’t know where else to go.” 

“The Barns,” Ronan said immediately. He couldn’t leave Noah here, in this place that was an empty shell of what it had been. In a place that was no longer home now that everyone who made it home was gone. Monmouth Manufacturing had been a base camp for Gansey and a refuge from Declan for Ronan. Now that the hunt for Glendower was over and now that Ronan had the Barns, it was just a building that held ghosts. Noah wasn’t a ghost anymore. He didn’t belong here.

It was a relief not to be asked if Ronan was sure. Or for a protest about something Ronan could barely comprehend. Instead, Noah said “help me pack.” 

And Ronan said, “Okay.”

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave kudos and a comment. I love comments. And thanks for reading.


End file.
